Anxiety can show up in many ways for kids, just like it does for adults—racing thoughts, tearfulness, stomach aches, or even refusal to go to school. As parents and teachers, we have an opportunity to teach our kids the skills they’ll use to cope with anxiety as it affects them throughout their entire lives. 

Because anxiety is so prevalent among kids right now, we find that parents are searching for strategies to help their kids cope. When we’re prepared to respond with effective strategies, we are better able to support our kids. Here are five things to remember when supporting anxious kids—along with practical sentence starters and strategies:

1. Normalize Anxious Feelings

Let your kids know that anxiety is a common experience. It can help to share that, while anxiety can feel unpleasant, it doesn’t mean anything is “wrong” with them. It means their brain is working to protect them.

Try saying:

• “Lots of people feel worried sometimes. You’re not alone.”
• “Anxiety is our body’s alarm system; it’s meant to protect us! But, sometimes it goes off even when there’s no real danger.”
• “Did I ever tell you about the time when I was a kid and I was anxious about…”

2. Recognize Body Clues

A lot of times (and especially for kids who are still working on identifying and naming their feelings) anxiety shows up in the body before we even realize we’re worried. We can help our kids tune into these signals.

Try saying:

• “Do you feel anything different in your body right now, like maybe butterflies, a fast heartbeat, or tight muscles?”
• “Sometimes our bodies try to tell us we’re anxious before our brain knows.”
  
  

Bonus Strategy:
Ask your kiddo to point to where they feel the anxiety. This can help externalize the feeling and reduce fear.

3. Work on Calming Techniques

The best way to cope with anxiety is to have techniques and tools at the ready for when it strikes. Giving your kids tools to calm their bodies will help quiet their anxious mind, too.

Try saying:

• “Let’s start with a calming exercise to help your body feel better.”
• “Even when your brain is feeling nervous, we can help your body feel safe.”

Bonus Calming Strategies:

• Balloon breathing: “Let’s pretend we’re blowing up a balloon. Big, slow breaths.”
• 5-4-3-2-1 grounding: “Can you name 5 things you see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you hear...”
• Muscle relaxation: “Let’s squeeze our fists tight...and then let go.”

4. Push through Anxious Moments Together

Instead of avoiding anxiety triggers, we can help kids take small, manageable steps toward facing them, with support, encouragement, and patience. That way, the anxiety shrinks as kids see and understand their capacity to get through hard things. When we avoid triggers, anxiety about them can grow.

Try saying:

• “What’s one small thing you feel ready to try, even if it feels a little scary?”
• “I’ll be right here with you while you try.”

5. Keep Conversations Open and Safe

We want to ensure our kids know it's okay to talk about anxiety anytime, without judgment or pressure. Sometimes, just being heard helps ease both the mind and body. We don’t want to logic the feelings away, but rather listen and validate the feelings.

Try saying:

• “You can talk to me about anything you're feeling. Even the tough stuff!”
• “Thank you for telling me. That takes a lot of courage.”
• “It makes sense that you feel that way…”
  
  

Reminder: Helping kids cope with anxiety doesn’t mean making every worry go away (as much as we wish we could). It means giving them tools, confidence, and self-compassion as they learn to manage tough emotions. Our goal is to help our kids get through tough moments, rather than around them.