Why Sleep Matters More than you Think: Regulation, Mood, and Behavior

By Josh MacNeill

It has been long understood that sleep is important for children’s physical development and general health. We know that good sleep contributes to a healthy immune system and consistent growth patterns. What may be less obvious is the powerful impact sleep can have on our kids’ mental health, self-regulation, and behavior.

When we are asleep, our brains process, organize, and store information from the day. This is not only true for academic content kids engage with during their school day, but also for everything they take in, including their social interactions, feelings, and emotions.  The old adage of, “sleeping on” a big decision is actually really wise – a new day literally provides a fresh perspective on yesterday’s challenges, making answers to difficult questions a bit more clear. The same is true for our children, who need a good night’s sleep to digest their day’s-worth of input.

Encouraging and supporting children in getting quality and consistent sleep is one of the best ways to ensure they are prepared to take on the challenges of a new day.  There are a few key things to consider as you reflect on your child’s sleep:

A Case of the Mondays: Many families will loosen their sleep routines on the weekends – activities, parties, family time, fun, and travel can push those bedtimes later. However, if you are finding that your child has a really difficult time getting  to school on Mondays, or maybe you even see a trend that they are more likely to get in trouble on Mondays, you might want to consider keeping your week-day sleep routine the same all weekend long. This will increase their rest over the course of the week, and ensure their brains are primed and ready for school’s specific expectations on behavior.

Tough Talks: If you know you need to have a tough conversation with your child – whether it’s about grades, a big life transition, or any conversation they might have a big emotional reaction to – it’s helpful to ensure they’re well-rested at the time of the conversation. A less rested brain will be primed for emotional response, and less able to access the parts of the brain responsible for logical thinking. And, we may be prepared for those emotional reactions, as they could be completely developmentally appropriate; but, we also know that less rest may increase the severity and duration of the emotional reaction, which could make it unnecessarily difficult for your child, and more challenging to recover from.

Discuss and Adjust: Sleep routines work best when children feel included. Instead of setting a routine and never revisiting it, it can help to have simple, open conversations about sleep. Explain why sleep matters for your child’s mood, focus, and behavior; and then listen to what feels hard for them about bedtime or waking up. When appropriate, make small, temporary adjustments together. Involving children in the process builds cooperation while still keeping healthy sleep boundaries in place.

Better sleep will not resolve every challenge in your home; but, a well rested child will be more likely to present the best version of themselves, and they will be more prepared to focus on their academic, emotional, and social areas of growth.

Sources:

Stanford Medicine: How sleep affects mental health (and vice versa): What the science says

University of Colorado: Making memories: Brain waves during sleep provide a picture of how it works